June 2009

This city for me has been much like its weather: when the days are sunny and warm there is no place better to be in the world. But there are still those many days where the fog covers the bridge, the cool wind blows off the Pacific, and even the sun can’t warm you. I cannot even begin to think of how many things I will miss because there are so many. What I will miss most is the very thing that I take with me – that these past two years in this city have taught me who I was all along. I came here on a chance and I’m leaving with the knowledge that the risk was worth the reward, even if it is a different reward and outcome than I had first imagined.

Today was the Pride Parade in San Francisco and it was ever the extravaganza. I cannot believe that the parade started before I got there (at 10:30), lasted through watching, through us having lunch, through us watching some more, and was still going on when we decided to take off. With the amount of people in the parade itself I can’t believe there were still so many to stand on the streets cheering. What a great thing to see in my last few days here in San Francisco and I’m so glad that my dad and Kathy and Lauren were here to join me too .

Of course there were floats, costumes, and the fabulous music and dancing that you would expect.

What I didn’t expect was that I would get teary eyed and emotional. Especially when the PFLAG (Parents, Families, Friends of Lesbians and Gays) floats and people went past. Some of the signs like “We got married for our kids” or “My son is gay” and the people walking past hand in hand with their kids or kids carrying rainbow flags and umbrellas. Wow it was just really moving. I just the other night watched some more of Prayers for Bobby on Lifetime and if you haven’t seen it yet and catch it on tv definitely check it out.

Living in San Francisco has really been such an eye opening experience for me, especially when it comes to my beliefs about gay rights and even just that alone makes me so happy to have experienced this city.

It’s been a whirlwind few days since Dad, Kathy, and Lauren got into town. Kathy described it as “a marathon” tour of San Francisco. Marina, Haight Ashbury, Alamo Square, Fillmore stairs, Fisherman’s wharf, North Beach, Stinkin’ Rose, Farmer’s Market, Golden Gate Bridge, Muir Woods, Ocean Beach, Beach Chalet … phew and that was just two days. Today we are going to take in some of the Pride Parade, do Union Square, head to Fort Funston, maybe Ghiradelli Square, then Golden Gate Park and the museums it includes on Monday. There’s nothing like San Francisco!

… wow there’s nothing like San Francisco. What a true statement. I was picking up some Philz Coffee to take home with me to Texas yesterday morning and it hit me how it’s even in the little things that I can tell how much San Francisco has influenced who I have become. The fact that I drink drip coffee or Americanos over mochas or that I love red wine. I care less about WHAT I’m wearing and more about if it can easily have a layer taken off and shoved in my purse.

Obviously it’s in the big things too. Like that I recognize that at almost 25 I am still so young and have so much life ahead of me. Yet I think living here has made me realize that San Francisco is a city where people many times live the same life day in and day out from the age of 25 to 35 and although that can work for many, that is not even close to what I want. I am so glad to have had the experiences I have had in my life thus far but so much of me knows that the best is yet to come.

Last day of work at Blood Centers of the Pacific today. It was bittersweet, which I understand is a word I am completely overusing lately but it is really so much the only word I have to describe what my leaving San Francisco feels like to me. I have had such a great time getting to work at a nonprofit with such a fantastic history and reputation for all of the good that it does here in the Bay Area. It certainly was not the type of nonprofit job I imagined myself getting but it was a great experience.

I can definitely say I will now be a blood donor for life. As cheesy as it may be that alone has been the number one thing I am taking from my job at the Blood Centers. Not that there were not so many other things I learned, but I can really say that the most lasting impression my job has had on me was to gain such a deep understanding on how hard it is to get people to do something that has such a profound impact on a person’s life, on the community as a whole, and on us as people. I am really glad that this job inspired me to learn what it means to give of myself in the most literal sense possible and to do so with an understanding of how incredible of a gift it really can be.

One more day left at Blood Centers of the Pacific so my coworkers and I decided to head over to Fly after work to grab drinks and half price pizzas for happy hour. I am not quite sure why we didn’t do this before? There’s something bittersweet about realizing “wow I really DO have some great coworkers” on the day before you are leaving. Although I suppose I knew I had some great coworkers before today I just didn’t get a chance to drink Sangria and talk “non business” with them until now. So one more day left. I’ll try to avoid getting any gray hair before then!

As my time here winds down and I get packed up to leave on Tuesday I’m beginning to have more trouble not getting teary eyed at random moments. As I drive up the hills on the way to work past some of my favorite community artwork and mosaics. While I’m sitting in the sun with the cool breeze blowing past. Realizing how fantastically diverse and unique this city is where I have had the opportunity to live for the past two years. I will miss driving up the 101 and seeing the skyline come into view … of course when the fog hasn’t yet rolled in.

This city has held such great promise and dreams for me and I think the hardest part of leaving it is saying goodbye to some of those dreams and beginning to open up my mind to a new door that is opening. I still am unsure of where the road will take me but I’m going to keep on walking.

It was an afternoon spent down by the Marina waiting for Glory to get beautiful. By beautiful of course I mean she was getting shaved so that she is Texas ready. Although many people might think that a 75 pound golden with no hair looks kinda silly, I think she is quite cute. Plus now when she sits up in the car and hangs her head out the window you can see her old lady tummy pooch. Time to add in some more power walking!

Anneliese came over tonight and we had a fantastic night of tv watching. Is it bad that after watching 5 minutes of the Real Housewives of New Jersey Reunion show we decided that it would be LESS painful to watch weird pregnancy stories on Discovery Health? Those housewives are ridiculous. Seriously I’d take a stone baby over that Teresa flipping a table any day. And TJ brought me my last (probably) taste of Tuttimelon at least for quite some time. Honestly … thank God for blogs so I can keep up with that girl!

Now off to watch the Duggars. They’re roller skating for one of the kids birthdays .. who knows which one. Seriously it is making me want to roller skate. And making me less freaked out about having a stone baby. I mean she had 18 just fine right so it can’t be that common?

I’ll miss the therapeutic drive from San Francisco to Santa Cruz on the 280 with blue skies and gorgeous views.

I won’t miss the traffic on the Bay Bridge.

(I will stop taking photos while driving)

Spent Thursday through yesterday in Houston realizing that:

• it still is ridiculously hot and humid there
• I have really missed snow cones and my mom’s veggies on the grill
• no matter how cool the breeze feels at night you really can’t wear jeans in June
• Which Wich egg salad sandwich makes my life complete
• mosquitoes are products of the devil and were put here to make me miserable
• there’s no place like home

Two weeks from today and I’ll be heading to the airport, car packed, Glory in the back seat, ready to pick up my mom and drive back to the Lone Star state!

I love this picture.

Tomorrow me, my two 50 lb. (hopefully no more) suitcases, my as-big-as-they-allow-it carry on, and backpack struggle to the airport and head to Houston. I worked out today and used the 8 lb. weights instead of the 5 lb. ones so that I would be extra prepared. I think it is back-firing because I’m already sore.